Complicated Reality

Let's See, Depression had my mind feeling dry

I'd still get up every day, but I didn't know why.

I didn't want to die, I just didn't really want to wake up.

I had a hard time justifying the little space that I'd take up.

Life began to break up and rearrange in pieces

I thought it was the end until I heard a strange thesis:

Minds don't die, they just get stuck in a gear

glued in by comfort, cemented by fear.

So I took a chance and tried a Little Something Different,

and in one night, I came away with an entirely new sentiment:

My mind was alive, not just surviving but resplendent

and not confined to the boundaries on which I'd become dependent.

In the darkness of the night under a sliver of a moon,

I walked around the palace of my mind in full bloom.

I found doors in front of memories, windows to my dreams

and the mechanics of my psyche splayed out across the screens.

I saw some disrepair, had to navigate some scar tissue.

Sometimes it's the mending, not the cut that's the issue.

I saw that the pit around me will never really get filled

but found paradise is possible if I'm not afraid to build.

Sometimes I'm building ladders, sometimes I'm building nets,

so that when I fall I'm not impaled upon bitter regrets.

I just climb back up so I can try to reach a little higher

because I want to ascend and soak in some star fire.

Let Sun Dance on my skin when I emerge from the earth.

To stand proud in this world without questioning my worth.

I'm going to rise up and bask in the glory of a sunset,

it might take me a bit, but I promise I'm not done yet.